My husband is a magician. A real, live, deck-of-card-carrying, will-perform-at-your-next-party magician. It is really fun to tell people about my husband, “Magic Evan,” because I can almost see them become children again. Everyone loves magicians. Everyone remembers the first time they saw a scarf disappear, or when someone found their specific card in a deck. It makes us confused and weirded out, but also excited that there is something in the world that can still surprise us.
There are questions that I often get asked when people find out that I’m married to a magician, so I figured I would just answer them here (once and for all?).
“Does he do tricks for you?”
I love this question. Yes, he does do tricks for me. It’s actually one of the things he did that won me over. On our first date he pulled out a deck of cards. I was very confused and asked him if he wanted to play a card game (which would have been super weird because we were at a wine bar). He said no, that he was a magician and wanted to show me a trick. I giggled like a little girl and allowed him to proceed. Of course I was dazzled! I kept asking him to do more, to tell me how he did it (“Dance, Monkey, Dance!) I have always loved magic. My sisters and I used to watch David Copperfield specials all the time when we were kids, so it was crazy exciting for me to be sitting across from a real life magician. I was hooked!
Since then I have seen many more of his tricks: flashes of fire turning into hershey kisses, cards produced with my name on them, time literally going backwards. It never fails to amaze me.
“Do you know how he does that?”
I like to tell people no, because I want them to believe that the magic is real. But I’m lying, I totally know how most of the tricks work. At first, I figured out a lot of them because I saw him do the tricks over and over. A magician is never supposed to do a trick more than once for the same audience because then the audience knows what to expect and might be able to find the moment when it happens. That’s really what happened to me. I started seeing elements of the trick and telling him that I knew what was happening (not in front of people, obviously). Then it became something we could talk about. I started watching DVDs about new tricks with him and really understanding what was happening, instead of just guessing. He runs tricks by me before he gets them, and then when he is trying something new, I’m his first audience member. I know how the tricks are supposed to look, so I can tell him if something looks great or needs more work. Doing magic well is truly an art and takes a lot of practice. Usually it’s really exciting to know that I’m helping him to be better at what he does.
“Will you tell me how he does it?”
Definitely not. I promise though, you don’t want to know. Knowing what I know and watching magic the way I do can sometimes take away the excitement. I know too much to just sit back and watch a trick. I’m always looking for the moment the “trick” happens, and I know what to look for. Now I have to tell Evan not to tell me how a trick works so that I can be an audience member again. Seriously, just enjoy the magic, don’t worry about how its happening.
“So what’s it really like?”
Well, I’ve never had another husband so I can’t compare being married to a magician to being married to someone with any other profession. I imagine it has the same ups and downs of anything since we are just two newlyweds. Most of the time it’s great. I get to be a sounding board for the person I love and help him to be the best he can at what he loves. I’m a problem solver by nature, so I like helping him figure out the best angles and versions for his scripts and shows. I like hearing about all the shows he books and how excited he is when he gets mentioned online or someone comments on his Facebook page. Its great to see the person you love doing well with what they love.
Of course there are the times when I don’t want to talk about magic. When the season premiere of Grey’s Anatomy coincides with him introducing a new trick into his show. We have had to set boundaries on what TV shows can be interrupted (any reruns or non-sweeps episodes) and which can’t (season premieres and finales are 100% off limits, and God help you if you try and talk to me if there is any kind of crash/death/birth, tragic event on one of my favorite shows!). There are elements of business that he finds fascinating and tell me all about that I am just not that interested in. While I try and listen the best that I can, I don’t think I can offer the best or most informed advice. Though I imagine that he probably feels the same way when I try and relay the entire plot of this week’s New Girl or tell him about the fight that my friends are having.
I imagine being married to a magician is a lot like anything else. There is excitement, and compromise, and a lot of love. There are moments that take your breath away and times you just need to be alone. But I love being married to a magician because my husband is someone who is ambitious, who is building his own business and doing great at it. When people ask me about being married to a magician, I hope my pride comes through most of all, beyond the answers to these questions. I am unbelievably proud to be married to such a creative, hard working, and successful man.
You can find my husband here: www.magicevan.com